How To Develop Self-Control - Tenzin Jambey

In life, we will encounter many situations that can make us lose self-control; we also become rough, nasty, and rude with others. When we lose self-control, we lose our identity and become an evil version of ourselves with bad attitudes and deviant minds. 

What leads us to lose our "self-control"? Firstly, self-control means the ability or the power to control yourself and your mind from performing any actions or work, we often come across some circumstances it situations that make us feel angry, hateful, and annoyed, and we also think like inflicting others, this all feelings and emotions are the effects of losing self-control. People say "calm down" and "cool down" when we get angry, but their words don't reflect upon us. It is always us who can cool the anger of our self but, but for this, we need to develop extreme self-control.

There are various ways through which we can develop and make our "self-control" strong. For me, the best practices are as follows:

1) MEDITATION

I was also once an insulting boy who often ignored others and hardly obeyed my teacher's instructions. It was all because of anger and the developed urges within me. One day one of my friends suggested I practice meditation, but I was surprised to find out how it worked. He told me I just have to relax and forget about all images and memories for a while. I found a change in myself after a few days, and now I am better at controlling my anger; whenever I feel angry, I simply try to forget the cause. Therefore, one should mediate to develop self-control.

2) DEEP BREATH FORMULA

This one is very effective when you are struggling to develop self-control. We feel diffident, nervous and frightened regarding social activities like public speaking and debates. We get these emotions as we are not used to them, as in the case of writing. When we are about to perform or participate in any social activities, we need to relax for a few minutes by closing our eyes, taking deep breaths, and always making ourselves comfortable before doing any new things,  curriculum,  activities, work, etc.

These two methods are instrumental, like the word "very" itself, if they are practised well, and these methods can make a person's life look even more beautiful.

- Tenzin Jambey

Pestalozzi Children's Village India

Reflections from the book we are reading

Positive thinking - Rishona Chopra

Experiencing a life full of different events, which can be harmful at times, can be demanding and make life a difficult journey of ups and downs. We also realize that we can withstand and tolerate situations, and not only a few people but all of us try to some extent or the other. Of course, some of us fail entirely, also. 

There is no substitute for correct thinking when a difficult situation is in front of you. You think negatively but act according to the spiritual knowledge you have read. That will not make you successful in overcoming the situation. Inner habits of creating thoughts of fear, pessimism, hopelessness and impatience will not reduce, although we may temporarily feel positive based on what we have read or learnt. 

Inner habits are intense and have been inside the inner spiritual being or soul since many births. Each time we have performed an adverse action or created a negative thought, a sanskara was made based on that thought, word or action. This is the cycle of repetition. And this cycle keeps having a more powerful negative influence on us the more it is repeated. 

We must get out of this vicious cycle and convert these constant negative thoughts into positive ones. We have several goals, but the first goal should be to eliminate negative beliefs and replace them with positive ones. This takes a calm mind with determination. We should never think we can't be positive as we still have those qualities in us.

Rishona Chopra
Grade VI
Gyanshree School