Learning Forward with Dr Niti Rana

Coming Soon Learning Forward Podcast

with Dr Niti Rana, in conversation with Anvesha and Rishona

Dr Niti Rana is the founder of Rakshya Nepal, an organisation established in 2008 to address the issue of school bullying. Through her work, Dr Rana has significantly contributed to raising awareness about and combating school bullying in Nepal. Her organisation, Rakshya Nepal, works towards creating safe and inclusive learning environments for students by implementing anti-bullying programs and providing support to victims of bullying. Dr. Niti Rana's dedication and efforts have positively impacted the lives of many students in Nepal.

Read more in the book School Bullying: Peer Victimisation and How to Deal with It.

Reflection on peer pressure - Aati Pema

How I see peer pressure.

Aati Pema

Pestalozzi Children's Village India

 

Reflection on the topic Peer Pressure - Tenzin Jambey

In the Oxford dictionary, the word "peer " means people of the same age as you, and "pressure" means forcing someone to do certain things or activities.

It feels fun to do things with our friends; we play, study, and spend time with our friends in school and without friends, life would be pretty dull. When we make friends at first, we never know who is nasty or good; only after spending some time do we learn about our friend's personalities and mentality. A good friend will always think and wish for good welfare, but a lousy friend will try to pull you in the wrong direction. Bad friends often put pressure on you to do the activities which they do. 

If I had to tell you how to overcome peer pressure, then I would say we should break our bond with the wrong people or bad friends as we know a bad person always puts pressure on you and will always emphasise on wrong things, but we should first try to change them and if they don't change then we must simply end our bond with them. A good friend would never pressure you and always teach you productive things.

Tenzin Jambey

Pestalozzi Children's Village India

Reflection on the topic Peer Pressure - Nishan Karki

At any given point, you can release your most fabulous self. Don't let anyone hold you back. Don't let anyone dilute you. Don't be peer pressured into being less than you are. - Steve Maraboli

Reading The Art Of Focus at the Sunday School.

Peer pressure means a strong influence on a person by another person's behaviour and specific actions. It makes a person behave the same as the other, although the behaviour of the other may not be good. It is one of the significant problems of youth and societies. The primary source of peer pressure on students is their friends. A lousy friend may encourage his friend to fight, smoke, take drugs, smuggle, etc. These evil actions cause peer pressure on people.

The effects of peer pressure are:-
• Peer pressure hampers day to day life of people and creates hurdles in their lives.
• It can cause depression in case of performance of serious actions
• It creates a distraction from good works
• It leads to a change in the behaviour and attitude of people.

There are many measures to reduce peer pressure. Some of them are:-

• Avoiding fights and other serious actions
• Hanging around less with friends
• Making a reliable friend
• Concentrating more on self-work
• We should say no to bad things and yes to good.

- Nishan Karki

What is peer pressure and how can we deal with it? - Rishona Chopra

Peer pressure is the pressure we face from our peers to do something. It indirectly or directly affects us. Often we find ourselves pretending to fit in the crowd, so we start doing things and becoming people we are not. We lose our own identity just to make 'friends'. But friends who force you to do something or friends who you cannot be yourself around aren't really friends, are they?

Each of us has our own identity, which we are given for a reason because we all are unique, we put on a different persona, and it affects no one but us.  

Being with the right company matters a lot. One ripe apple kept with ten other rotten apples will soon rot too. It is better to be alone than with bad friends. 

Dealing with peer pressure, though, is quite a challenge. Often people try to bully us by telling us that we are 'not cool' and 'boring'. But we must remember that the right path is often alone, but being alone doesn't mean we must be lonely. Ignoring people like that is the best way. We need to have a calm and composed mind that knows what is right and wrong. We do what we do, and pressuring someone needs to be corrected. 

When we start ignoring all of this, people start bothering us because peer pressure that makes you do bad things is just to trouble you or force you towards the wrong path. 

While dealing with peer pressure, we might think, "everyone is doing this", or "what could be wrong with this?" but something correct is not what the majority does. People around us may TRY to have a strong influence on us but we have to be that one person who stands on the right path, whether alone or not. Their TRY must be a left a try only and be in vain. 

Because of peer pressure, we start feeling insecure about our own selves and doubting ourselves. All our choices and decisions seem to be made by others and their opinions, but it is OUR life, OUR choices, and they cannot be changed. People may give us good advice that we should always lend an ear to, but then again, there has to be a straight line between right and wrong, people you trust and don't. 

We may need friends at this age, even if that means pretending to do things they don't. It feels terrible when you have no one to sit with you, talk to you and a person you can share your thoughts with, but it's hard to find someone like that, with who you can be yourself ( apart from your parents, of course)!

Sometimes, I am in the impact of my peers. I know what they might be doing is wrong, but I just pretend to do what they do just so I can get along with them, but then you have to remember that you have higher goals in life. You have higher aspirations than pretending or changing yourself to make friends. 

Instead of finding company outside, we can be our own friends! No one knows us better than we do, and no one ever can! 

Rishona Chopra
Grade VII
Gyanshree School

What is peer pressure, and how can we deal with it? - Shambhavi Nautiyal

Reading Chapter 43, Sunday the 26th of March 2023

Peer pressure is the direct or indirect influence of our peers which tells us that we need to act in a certain way like the people surrounding us. It is often observed in teenage but continues as an existing matter throughout our lives regardless of age. It is a trap which makes people victims of many addicting and harmful practices. It could be wrong personality traits such as people pleasing and sometimes ruinous activities like smoking and drugs. 

It starts with compellingly curious intentions of just wanting to fit in, make friends and enjoy company, but later on, it becomes a habit. For instance, something often seen in the present youth is the following of the perpetually changing Instagram trends by young school-going teenagers to feel accepted and admired. 

We see kids going out of their way to follow social media trends and become famous because of peer pressure and the fact that this is seen as the definition of likeable and "cool". In school, too, we see popular girls and students liked by most of our peers or teachers, and we try to become like them. We observe that because of some of their habits, many people appreciate and admire them. To gain that popularity, we try to procure their idolized external features, skills or behaviours. In light of this fact, in this process, we lose ourselves. We lose our own identities. 

We never learn to love ourselves since we are compared to others by ourselves or our parents to our peers. We become even lonelier because of masking ourselves and never focusing on nurturing ourselves. We are left with no friends of our own, not even ourselves. Even when we stop trying to be like others, we still take that habit of people pleasing with us, in which we let people cross our boundaries and put them before ourselves, creating a frail sense of self-worth. However, we can fight it, come out of it and fix this whole scenario. 

As for me, I had been in some influencing company, and over time, I noticed that I had become a people pleaser and that I had been neglecting myself for my peers. I was listening more to them rather than my piece of mind. So, to fix those habits, I had to release that person from my life and start instilling healthier relationship patterns in my attitude. I had to change my outlook by changing my behaviour and thoughts. I had to make it clear to myself that it was okay for me to put myself and think about myself first before taking any decision instead of following my friends blindly and speculating about their behaviours, meaning how they treat me. I had to fix my sense of self-worth. 

So it is salient to love ourselves so that we don't compare ourselves to others and don't let others' judgements affect us, which calls out for having a deep sense of self-worth. We should practice self-compassion and not let ourselves get trapped in the vicious trap of peer pressure cause each one of us deserves to be loved, adored and treated like the queens and kings we are. So before judging yourself after seeing someone else, remind yourself of and be grateful for how confounding, worthy and attractive you are.

Always keep that in mind before wandering to search for love outside; look inside, and you will find the person who has always been and shall always be ready to love you.

Shambhavi Nautiyal Ahlcon Public School